Rom Com Read online

Work Dirty Dancing into the conversation: Lift me.

  Cafés and diners, people meet there

  to do obvious things: eat, talk, feel disappointed.

  A screaming woman downs mouthfuls

  of pot pie, makes a scene. In the end I always say,

  “I’ll have what she’s having.” What might happen

  to a person who rejects a ticking clock,

  a romantic time bomb, a white tablecloth.

  Because you’re a goofball. Like, the real kind.

  Not Jennifer Aniston flipping her perfect hair

  into a perfect pratfall into a perfect pec.

  You need abs to love. You need abs to be loved.

  To clarify, not just abs, we all have some

  abs underneath, all up in there, but you need

  visible abs. Abs that cut glass

  and grate cheese over nachos you won’t eat,

  abs that heal the sick and send life-saving injections

  to countries you don’t know how to spell correctly.

  At night I cry out, “Where is my Mark Darcy?”

  Straight, awkward men in indies are always afraid to be called

  faggot, like the world has limits on them. I only listen to vinyl. I watched

  the depression montage for one minute, which compared

  to my life is the equivalent of ten years. The perks of being

  a wallflower is writing poetry no one likes. Sup?

  Nothing, what’s

  up with you? Nothing. You can’t fill in the spaces he cuts

  himself. “You put the ass in class.” When the apocalypse came

  I was only worried about Twinkies and an amusement park.

  Singing, “I wanna grow old with you.” If you watch this movie

  backwards, I will walk out of your life and onto the streets.

  Dina Del Bucchia is the author of Coping with Emotions and Otters (Talonbooks, 2013) and Blind Items (Insomniac Press, 2014). She guest edited the Humour issue of Poetry Is Dead magazine and is the artistic director of the Real Vancouver Writers’ Series. Her story “Under the ‘I’ ” was a finalist for the RBC Bronwen Wallace Award. Dina co-hosts the podcast Can’t Lit with Daniel Zomparelli. She holds an MFA from the University of British Columbia and lives in Vancouver.

  Daniel Zomparelli is editor-in-chief of Poetry Is Dead magazine, a semi-annual publication devoted to poetry in Canada. He is a co-podcaster at Can’t Lit, a monthly webcast on all things Canadian and literature. His first book of poems, Davie Street Translations (2012), was published by Talonbooks. Current endeavours include After You, a series of interconnected poems that span North America.

  More Poetry by Dina Del Bucchia

  Blind Items

  Coping with Emotions and Otters *

  More Poetry by Daniel Zomparelli

  Davie Street Translations *

  * Published by Talonbooks

  About Talonbooks

  Thank you for purchasing and reading Rom Com.

  If you came across this ebook by some other means, feel free to purchase it and support our hard work. It is available through most major online ebook retailers and on our website. The print edition is also available.

  Talonbooks is a small, independent, Canadian book publishing company. We have been publishing works of the highest literary merit since the 1960s. With more than 500 books in print, we offer drama, poetry, fiction, and non-fiction by local playwrights, poets, and authors from the mainstream and margins of Canada’s three founding nations, as well as both visible and invisible minorities within Canada’s cultural mosaic.

  Learn more about us and the authors, Dina Del Bucchia and Daniel Zomparelli.

  To print your own copies of the Dina and Daniel paper dolls, visit our website!

  © 2015 Dina Del Bucchia and Daniel Zomparelli

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written consent of the publisher or a licence from Access Copyright (The Canadian Copyright Licensing Agency). For a copyright licence, visit accesscopyright.ca or call toll free to 1-800-893-5777.

  Talonbooks

  278 East First Avenue, Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada V5T 1A6

  www.talonbooks.com

  First printing and electronic edition: 2015

  Interior design by Chloë Filson. Cover design by Typesmith

  Cover illustration by Alan Hindle

  Paper doll illustrations by Alana Green

  Talonbooks gratefully acknowledges the financial support of the Canada Council for the Arts, the Government of Canada through the Canada Book Fund, and the Province of British Columbia through the British Columbia Arts Council and the Book Publishing Tax Credit.

  LIBRARY AND ARCHIVES CANADA CATALOGUING IN PUBLICATION

  Del Bucchia, Dina, 1979–, author

  Rom com / Dina Del Bucchia and Daniel Zomparelli.

  Poems.

  ISBN 978-0-88922-960-0 (paperback)

  ISBN 978-0-88922-998-3 (ebook)

  I. Zomparelli, Daniel, 1985–, author II. Title.

  PS8607.E482538R64 2015 C811’.6 C2015-905052-9